Gold, or Fool's Gold?

I apply for multiple jobs a day. In multiple cities. Requiring a multitude of skills. I rarely have gotten responses but this past week I've been lucky. I've received three responses to applications I have sent off.

That's amazing! Right? In theory, yes it is. For someone who has spent NINE very long months looking for work and who has poured every last ounce of what is left of her sanity into writing effective cover letters and polishing her resume so that they both shine like gold, yes, three responses in a week is amazing.

But there is a downside.

The first response was the offer from my landlord. Since my initial work for her - which I have yet to be paid for - there has been no action. Next week promises to be busier as we move to applying for a hearing to evict our problematic bedbug-ridden-amateur-interior-designer. That requires some work and hopefully I can collect on all of it.

Second response was from a researcher position out of town. I got a one line complimentary e-mail two hours after submitting my cover letter and resume with a cheeky ending asking if the commute isn't a bit too much. I responded and explained my willingness to relocate and that I'd be happy to meet with them to discuss the position further. And since… NOTHING. No response. No request for an interview. Nothing. Not even a courtesy call or e-mail to say I'm no longer being considered.

Third response was from a property management company that is a two minute walk from my apartment door. The guy called me yesterday to discuss my license to practice law, a scenario-based tenant question, a discussion on referral fees paid to him for cases he sends my way (which is prohibited by the rules of professional conduct), and a request for my e-mail address for further correspondence. I got an e-mail a few minutes after our call asking for my contact information and when I would be free to meet. I wrote back asking if the next day at 10 am would suit him and his response was that he would get back to me by the end of the day. That was YESTERDAY! I followed up before end of business yesterday to confirm whether or not we had a meeting. No response. I wrote another message mid-morning today saying I was free all day Friday. Still no response.

Here's my rant to potential employers:

1. Don't write an e-mail to someone in response to their application unless you intend on seriously considering them for the position they applied for. It's fucking soul-crushing to be complimented on your resume, have the long distance commute pointed out just for the sake of it and then not even be offered an interview. That is fucking rude, so don't do it.

2. When calling an applicant for a job, don't hold multiple short conversations interrupting that call. It's rude, unprofessional and tells the applicant that they aren't really that important to you. It tells them you are disorganized or understaffed and that you weren't raised right. And I haven't even met you yet.

3. Also when e-mailing a job applicant, you probably a) shouldn't ask for their full contact details (since they were provided on both their cover letter AND resume) and b) ask if they have a Facebook account. I understand that this is the age of social media but I am not going to add some potential employment provider who can't even schedule an interview with me over the phone. Since, knowing details is part of their business, it doesn't bode well to a potential applicant if you can't master reading basic information. It lacks both professionalism and shows immaturity. I did look you up on Facebook though and I think your page should be more private or you should set up separate personal and professional accounts. Just a thought.

4. Finally, if you advise an applicant that you will confirm something later in the day you better goddamned do it. Again, it shows a lack of respect and professionalism toward the applicant. Not to mention that if they have the professionalism to write you cordially two more times offering alternative days and times to meet, you should AT THE VERY LEAST respond with a quick note about being busy or some other plausible excuse. Don't make them guess or wait wondering.

And to the job I interviewed for last month and followed up with asking if they had made a decision who responded that they were still reviewing candidates and that they would advise me of their decision “either way”… FUCK YOU. It's been over a month and I have yet to receive a response, so I am left to assume that they chose another candidate. Again, a lack of professionalism on their part.

It's a jungle out there jobseekers… and the gatekeepers are rude, unprofessional, cheeky assholes who are going to taunt you by dangling the carrot just out of reach. Find better people to work for than those assholes.

I'll keep on trudging on…

NEXT UP: An overhaul, of sorts.